What Happened and What's Going On

Today is the day that I have an actual Japanese visa in my hands. It seems that the preparation time for what is coming next is finally almost over. It has been quite the journey.

When I first recieved my acceptance letter from ywam Tokyo as a staff member I had no idea it would take well over a year to actually step foot in Japan. Even now, it's almost hard to believe I will be there in less than two months.

But things are finally picking up.

In 2012, when I was still in Japan, The Lord told me that this time at home was going to be very important. He said it would be a season full of revelations of joy. Looking backward now, it is clear that He has been faithful.

Although I have endured many lessons from the Lord during my time back in Orange County, the constant area of growth has been seeking Him in the Secret Place. He has been teaching me about finding everything I need in Him, and searching for Him daily.

I never knew how important it was.

Prayer is life, meditating on the Word is crucial, but listening for the Lord and waiting for personal interaction with Him is what makes all of that worthwhile. I want the fullness of who God is in my life, and ultimately, if I want to have the ministry of Love, I have to first let Him love me. It sounds strange, but I had to learn how to receive God's love.

All of this is easy to say and difficult to do. It requires me to allow God to actually deal with me. It is in this way that God has been developing my faith.

Everything that I learned in my Discipleship Training School has been tested. Considering how much I learned, it is easy to see why I have been here so long. But God has done so much more than I ever expected, and He loves me too much to allow me to move forward unprepared.

It was His grace that gave me the choice to live life with all the earthly comforts I could ever want. It was even moreso His grace to win my heart over again and again and show me that there is so much more than that.

"So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal," 2 Corinthans 4:16-18.

Jesus is my dream. I know where my treasure is, and I will not be tricked into settling for less than He wants to give. He is worth it. To live is Christ and to die is gain.

So as diffucult and full of warfare as this season has been, I am choosing to keep my eyes on Jesus. He is my beloved, and all of these days that have seemed quite ordinary are just the beginning of something extraordinary.

He is my Joy.